What should consent look like? Some argue that consent must be acquired and provided clearly and explicitly prior to any sexual activity, while others believe that while consent is necessary, expecting such candid statements to become popular is unrealistic. Although society must work towards becoming more comfortable with the idea of explicitly requesting and giving consent, difficulties using such unemotional language are understandable. Fortunately, there are ways to acquire consent that can feel more fun and natural.
Peace. It’s something many of us wish for, all over the world. For wars to stop, for bombings to end, for refugees to be able to return to their homes in safety.
And for others, peace means something closer to home. A home free of violence - of hitting, of screaming, of verbal abuse, or sexual abuse.
in recognition of this year’s International Day of Peace, we want to talk about peace at home, recognizing the major and long-term affects that an abusive home can have on those growing up in it, and what any one of us can do to help.
It starts in the home.
It starts with changing beliefs.
It starts with educating others.
It starts with ensuring more protection and support for victims.
And it starts with holding abusers accountable.
At every opportunity, in every context, domestic violence must be stopped.
How do you help a friend who is being abused? Unfortunately, it’s not always easy to know when someone is being abused, and many people just don’t know how to help, despite how much they care. This can also be true for younger women, especially teenagers who may not have had any education about how to distinguish between health and unhealthy relationships.
As parents, caregivers or teachers of teens, there are some important steps to take when it comes to talking to teens about healthy relationships and dating violence. Keeping the lines of communication open and ensuring you create a judgement-free, supportive environment is key. We’ve already discussed how dating violence is most definitely a teen issue and some typical warning signs to be on the lookout for. In this post about teens and healthy relationships, we want to go over some key points on how parents, caregivers and educators can talk to teens about these important issues.
When I was first asked to write a blog post in honour of Canada’s National Aboriginal Day on June 21, my first thought was of my recently passed Grandmother June McKay, because her birthday is on June 21. I recently had the pleasure of speaking with my grandmother’s cousin and close friend, Geraldine Robertson. Like my grandmother, Geraldine is also a strong, resilient, and beautiful First Nations woman. Geraldine is a residential school survivor. On May 5, Geraldine and I sat down for tea at her home on Aamjiwnaang First Nation. We discussed resiliency, making connections, and how she has supported other survivors to begin their healing journeys. In recognition of her work raising awareness about the legacy of residential schools, Geraldine was recently inducted into the Order of Ontario.
“She’s the glue that holds us together.” It’s not uncommon to hear these words spoken about moms, both young and old. When it comes to the family system, the reality is that many times, moms are the one who keep the day-to-day dealings of the family running smoothly. The physical and mental workload of raising a family is big, and moms are often responsible for much of it. But what if mom doesn’t have anyone looking out for her own well-being? Worse yet, what if the mom is being abused?
Humour and healing – there’s growing recognition of the powerful connection between a belly laugh and recovery from trauma. Whether you’re dealing with the stress and trauma that victims and survivors of abuse commonly suffer or you want to support someone who is, laughter can make things better. In fact, even the anticipation of laughter can boost your mood and relieve anxiety. Laughing releases endorphins, the feel-good hormones that make you feel happy. It relieves physical tension and stress and can help your muscles relax. Tenths of a second after you hear a punch line, a wave of electrical activity sweeps through your entire cortex, triggering positive physical changes in your brain. And it’s good for your heart because it increases oxygen in your blood and boosts circulation.
Domestic violence is a serious problem, but it’s not just a concern for adults. Young adults, especially teenagers, are often vulnerable to dating violence, in part because they haven’t been taught anything about it. Think back to your own foray into the teen years. Do you recall having conversations with your parents, educators, or even peers, about healthy vs. unhealthy relationships? Chances are, the answer is no. The dreaded “sex talks” that so many teens and parents alike faced, usually had nothing to do with dating abuse or the signs of an unhealthy relationship. Yet, these are key pieces we need to be teaching youth, from an early age.
You don’t have to go far to read about the potential health benefits of yoga – both for the body and the mind. However, for women and children who have experienced violence, being present in the body that has been the site of physical or sexual abuse, or receiving hands on adjustments, has the potential to trigger memories of past traumatic experiences. Trauma-Informed Yoga adapts traditional yoga techniques such as grounding exercises; simple yoga postures (asana); meditation; and therapeutic breath-work (pranayama) to make it more accessible and safe for individuals with experiences of violence. It focuses on safety, choice, and empowerment: invitational language and a no-touch, no-assist approach are used.